Today Jason took me to see the new campus. We picked up a girl who works for the school. I don't know who she was. Without any coffee, I was a limp noodle sloshing about in the car. I fell asleep and bobbled about like a buffoon. It took an hour to get there.
When we reached the campus, we drove through all this construction.
"All of this is the campus." The girl said. "In 22 days, this will all be complete and the students will start school."
I really couldn't believe that, honestly. The campus was huge and the construction on it was far from finished. Nothing looked closed to completion.
We went to look at a student dormitory and the girl talked to this lady there for a long time in Chinese, while i sat and did nothing. Finally, she said "So if you have class here in the morning, you are expected to stay here the night before because traffic may be bad in the morning and you won't get to class on time. The school provides a hotel for the teachers to stay in."
Then I started to get kind of angry. I've been super flexible about everything up to this point, but this just seemed ridiculous.
"This just seems really impractical. Is there any way for me to avoid that? If i have classes here 2-3 times a week, that means I have to spend 2-3 nights here? All of my stuff will be on the main campus. It will be difficult for me to do lesson plans. And I will have projects to do on the main campus that will be difficult for me to organize if I have to come over here every other night."
"This is only if you have class in the morning. We'll have to see your schedule." This frustrated me even more because I have been asking about this schedule for several days. It supposedly exists and is ready for me, but everyone keeps forgetting to show it to me.
"But still. The commute is long enough as it is. I really don't want to have to do this if I can avoid it. I really need to see that class schedule. When do classes start?"
"End of August. I think we also have some books for you."
"I don't get here until the first of September. I have to start immediately when I get here? I need to get those textbooks as soon as possible. I need to start preparing for these classes."
This is the first time I've gotten remotely upset or frustrated at anything since coming to China. From what I saw today, I felt like nothing was well organized or thought through concerning my position at this school on the part of the school. I feel like I was just haphazardly thrown into the class schedule and shifted around to wherever there was any space. In order to get what I need I'm going to have to push people to get it, which I'm well aware is not the cultural norm in China. I have avoided that kind of attitude because it's not well received here and doesn't leave a good impression on my colleagues. But I felt slightly taken advantage of. Those feelings grew when I finally did get to see my schedule and saw that most of my classes were on the new campus, an hour away, at very inconvenient times. I'll get into the schedule later.
Jason, that girl, and the driver took me home. I didn't have much to do, so I took a walk by myself. I went to the grocery store in front of the school and looked around to see what they have. I bought some instant coffee.
After dinner, my host parents invited me to san bu (take a walk) again. It was hot, so i wore shorts and a t-shirt. I had no idea we were going to meet up with the Executive Director of the new campus, Mr. Mao. I had briefly run into him earlier that day at the new campus, but only said hi. That evening we spent an hour walking through this community. His English is really good, and he constantly reminded me that we were going to be "close friends" over the next two years. He did all of the talking, so it wasn't that awkward. I felt underdressed though and I was soaked with sweat. But, like all Chinese men do here, he kept his shirt lifted up above his chest to keep his belly cool. It's kind of an awkward sight to most of us I think, but it's normal here and I'm getting used to it.
What was awkward though was how intimate he wanted to get with me right off the bat. He wanted to be best friends with me, talk to me every day so he could practice his English, invited me to come to his office anytime and expected me to drop in whenever I'm on the new campus. He loved the fact that I studied philosophy, and he wanted me to teach him about philosophy whenever I can. He said he would set me up with a Chinese girl. I said "whoa whoa, no. Don't do that." "I insist. We are close friends. It's what we do for each other. What kind of girl do you like? I will find one for you." He also asked questions about my religion, which caught me off guard. I told him I'm not religious and he seemed to like that answer. But I felt like I was in dangerous territory.
It's nice that I can consult Mr. Mao when I need help and the fact that someone with his influence in the school has taken a particular liking to me.
The problem with this kind of relationship, which is common in Chinese culture, is the concept of guanxi. The more someone does for you, the more it's kind of expected that you reciprocate those favors, even though that expectation will never be expressed. This is why I've always been uncomfortable with people doing things for me. I don't know what or how much they expect me to reciprocate. (I feel as though I'm intimately and inherently familiar with this and other Chinese cultural norms, but I'm not entirely sure where I got them from... More on this later). You can make it work for you, but I'm not yet bold enough. The Chinese do expect you to exchange guanxi with them. When they do things for you, they expect you to do things for them and then feel comfortable asking for favors. But asking for favors has never come naturally to me.
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